But when you smile, oh how I feel so good

I've had to move this post to a passworded account. It's still around, I did post it, but I had to move it. Sorry.

*cries*

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OK, so here's the deal: normally right before a test I do everything I can to avoid studying. Often I find myself planning the rest of my degree 'cos at least it's got something to do with school (it makes me feel less guilty I guess). So at 12pm today I have a test, and as normal I'm planning the rest of my degree

Anyway, up to now I thought that with some cunning on my part I'd be able to get out of this place in a year (that's 6 months early). I figured 2 Summer Semesters and BAM! I'm out of here. Every time I'd looked, I've been able to do this.

This time? Notsomuch.

Turns out that the compulsary third year paper I have to do as a geography major has been moved to Second Semester instead of First (when I was planning to do it).

What does this mean?

Well, it means I'm stuck in the hell hole that is Auckland for another six-God-damn months!! It also means that I have to do Summer School AND Second Semester. (I have to do Summer School as if I want to specialise in GIS (and I do) I have to do a course only offered in Summer School).

Fucking stupidity. If I wanted to specialise in physical geography and GIS I'd be fine, no problems, but I'm a human geographer through and through - I understand societies, cities and humans much more then I do waves and rivers and biogeography. If I didn't want to do GIS I'd be fine but the problem is, most of the jobs in geography are GIS based, or at least require understanding of GIS.

So what to do? I could get a Summer job that allows me to do a part-time Summer Semester I guess then do Second Semester as well (I was really hoping to be out of here come Second Semester). I could do Second Semester part-time (but then I have to work in Auckland in an actual job and quite frankly, fuck that). It's not all bad, there are other courses offered in Second Semester I was wanting to do and now I guess I can do them, but I really don't want to do both Summer and Second Semesters I guess.

I guess I'll sort it when I come to it, but I really wish they'd just put 315 into first Semester. Then I'd be happy.

Anyway, guess I should go learn about walking school busses...

City streets at night, can be so intimidating

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Here's the pain in the ass thing: the break in has changed our lives, and not necessarily for the better.

On one hand we've got ourselves a monitored alarm, security doors, insurance and written down the serial number of every major electronic in this house.

On the other we're afraid to sleep with our doors closed, afraid to turn off the bathroom light at night, afraid to leave and afraid to stay.

OK, it's not so much we're afraid as we feel safer with those things.

Yesterday I left the house for 10 minutes to go get a paper (I needed it for an assignment, and it had to be yesterday's paper), I felt free and at the same time worried. Free because I'd made it out of the house. Worried because I'd left Holly in there alone.

Today Holly left for work. I slept through her getting up, having a shower and getting ready, but the moment she closed the door (the new lock requires a bit of a slam) I sat bolt upright in bed. Took me about 5 minutes to work out why Holly wasn't here and what had woken me up.

We had almost as many people though our house yesterday then we have had collectively since we moved in.

I would quite like to go to uni today but I can't leave. Still more people are coming (today it's the glazier to replace two panes of glass the fucker cracked when his monkey foot kicked down our fucking door). Plus until the alarm and the safety doors are installed, we're not keen to leave the place.

I hate that he's changed our life. With three kicks he has changed our life.

I can't express how angry that makes me. That he broke into our house with the intention of taking our stuff that we have worked hard for. That he just wanted to take it, and that his greed has led to our fear. That he has made us feel unsafe in our own home because he wanted a PS2 or a big screen TV? That's the worst thing. That all this was over a few fucking gadgets.

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How to say this? Well this morning while sleeping I heard some loud banging - nothing unusual for this house as the pipes can get pretty loud from time to time. Also we back right on to the train tracks so noise doesn't tend to disturb me much.

This time was different however because after the banging I heard my flatmate yelling "What the fuck do you think you're doing?!"

For those who haven't met my flatmate she's lovely. Usually very even tempered and she doesn't swear. Her yelling is really what woke me up. I sat bolt upright in bed and asked "What? ME?!" to which she opened my door and said "no, some bastard's just broken down our door."

So after struggling into my pajamas I ran out to discover this:
He kicked our door down!!

Basically he'd knocked on the door (and woken up Holly who couldn't be bothered answering), then knocked on Holly's window (which made her suspect something), then tried to break down the back door (which somehow we overlooked until about 30 minutes ago), then the front.

Once in the front door, he got about a step in before Holly ran out screaming, then he took off.

Cops were here within 5 minutes, then fingerprint people, then the landlord, then builders and security experts.

We've had phone calls from family, friends and called an alarm company. The security on this place is going to be beefed up something shocking by the end of the week and until then Holly and I will be extremely reluctant to leave it. (Infact both of us are reluctant to leave each other at the moment).

It got us thinking, it's got us moving. We refuse to give in to this asshole. We're not moving, we're going to beef up security and move on. Fuck him. What kind of a wanker invades the home of two women in search of some electronics and DVDs? Obviously if he were going to be violent we'd have known about it by now, and I think Holly gave him such a fright he won't be coming back (we hadn't answered the door at all and yet we were home, there is no guarantee that we answer the door when we're home). Really this is the best thing that could happen, but there's something about a home invasion that shocks to your core.

He was here, he invaded our privacy, our home. He came with the intent of taking our things that we worked hard to have. He wanted to take them from us without earning it. He wanted to do it the easy way.

Fuck him.

Sometimes I don't understand Auckland

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Why would ANYONE in their right mind want to get rid of this?



It's one of the best things about this stupid city!

Really? Is it hard?

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I've been spending some time on nzdating.com over the holidays and it amazes me the behaviour of men.

I mean, why do they send me pictures of their penis?

I liken it to meeting someone in a bar. Noone walks up to a girl in a bar, flops out their piece and says "hey babe, you want to suck on this? Come out to Manukau and we'll get in on in the back of my car" and yet the online equivelent of this (sending a pic and a message) seems to be entirely appropriate.

I'm not that difficult to get into bed, I'm really not. The hardest bit is getting me to actually meet a guy. Once I'm meeting him all he has to do is carry a conversation and flirt. It might take a few dates, but it'll happen.

To be honest my profile says I'm bored and I'll chat "even if it's about your penis" but that is a JOKE. If guys actually want to talk about it, I always ask what they call it and then steer the conversation to something else, it's not an invitation to send me lurid pics. I understand the confusion but it happens to girls who don't have that on their profile.

It's an TVeaster Miracle

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I'm not making this shit up.

The TV is now working.

My TV died on Easter Friday and resurrected itself three days later on Easter Sunday.

I know some people practically worship their TV's but that's just silly!!

Happy TVeaster!

Warning: Mild Blasphemy Ahead

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So today's Good Friday. Today is the day that Jesus died nailed to a cross to pay for our sins. Horay for Jesus.

I woke up this morning and thought "I want to relax infront of the TV and watch Boy Meets World" (I've been slowly working my way thru the episodes, I'm onto season 3). So I went to turn on my TV.

The remote didn't work so I thought "Holly's turned it off again" and went to press the button, but the button was already pressed. A quick check said yes, it is plugged in... the projectionist in me plugged it into other sockets to see if it was the sockets...

My TV died on Easter Friday.

So according to the story, Jesus was resurrected 3 days later (Easter Sunday).

So we're wonderring... will my TV ressurrect on Sunday??

More news as it occurs...

A gentleman doesn't cum in your mouth

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Heh... been dying to use that as a title for over a week now. Quite possibly the world's funniest quote... but anyway...

I'm beginning to think that perhaps I don't take enough risks... that perhaps there's alot more to life then what I do with it. That there are people out there to meet, people to fuck, things to do.

That perhaps the existence I've been carving for myself over the years - hiding in my own shell, celebate (the exact time period for that one will not be announced to the world...) and hiding away from everything - well, maybe that's not the way I should live.

The way I'm living now is a damn sight better then the way I was living in mid-2003 where I literally didn't leave my room for fear of gaining the Wrath of The Evil Flatmate. At least life isn't like that anymore.

I'm also not depressed - I'm quite healthy and happy. A little dissatisfied with my weight, but I'd like to think I'm making some positive moves about that - I'm discovering more about myself - I've just got to work up the courage to get the help I need for all that.

I'm not addicted to drugs of any kind, I'm smoke-free, THC-free and (contrary to what those on the 207 field trip might think) I'm not a big drinker.

I get good grades, hold down a job... I'm incredibly lucky in that I'll be moving soon which means a better place and a better job (so excited about the new job).

But I still feel as if I'm missing love, affection. I think part of me feels like I don't deserve it, like I'm too fat, too ugly, too damaged. That it's going to take a special person to understand me - and perhaps all that's true - but I've been getting offers lately - lots of offers. Up until now I've turned down each and every one of them but I'm beginning to wonder if I really should?

Then I get to the point where I almost say yes, the crucial moment, and I freeze. I realise if I have sex with this person that person will abandon me and I'll have to stay and pick up the pieces all over again. That to have sex with that person means tears, and heartbreak and depression and time that I just don't want to spend mending my broken heart again.

Now I realise exactly how badly I was hurt all those years ago. I might not feel anything toward the person now, but I got very badly hurt, and even worse, very badly scarred - and I'm still paying for that one night.

TradeMyIdiot...

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Sometimes people like to prove to the world just what kind of idiots they really are. Today I've had a fantastic example of idiocy.

Firstly some background info: I'm a LOTR collector, and back in '04 I picked up some bags at the world premiere that I have been slowly selling when I am poor. I'm down to my last couple and I'd like a good price for them. I've recently put one up on TradeMe where it's been getting a large number of hits and while it hasn't hit reserve yet, these things never do until the last few hours anyway.

So I have this listing, it's doing ok, and then today I get this comment come through my inbox:

"have you checked out the $200 fading ticket stubb above this auction? i hope you all get your prices, i just want your newer bag as i have used MY bag until it is all tacky-looking! lol! :) these sorts of things are not rare at all but the LOTR craze is over. i have put up one-of-a-kind original art for as little as $1 reserve & not got even a nibble! so i wish you well, you guys, i really do!"

This almost killed me. No collector actually uses their bag. None! We have these bags as keepsakes, and they're either protected behind fadeproof glass or tucked away in some dry but dark corner with the rest of our valuable collections. To say his bag is all 'tacky-looking' makes me want to do nothing but hit him with a large and heavy stick!

Secondly I went and had a look at his "art", and found: it's crap.

So I wrote a sweet little reply that went like this:

"lol, well I'm not selling a used ticket stub, I'm selling a genuine collector's item, which many people would keep in pristine condition rather then abusing. You're right, the LOTR craze is over, my 'buy now' price is significantly higher then my reserve price and I don't honestly expect the buy now price to be reached, although it would be nice if it did. These bags, in good condition, rarely come on the market - less then 3000 were made and a significant proportion of them were thrown away. If a genuine collector (and yes, they still exist) wants this item, they will pay the quite reasonable reserve price for it."

Kinda nice seeing as this person seems to be a bit of a nut job and really I just wanted to remove their bid and tell them to go fuck themselves.

Then this evening I log on to find the following two comments:

"touche' about not taking care of one's collector's items...but i have so many!...and all is doomed to fade into the west! :) the bags were designed to be useful after all, & it's tempting to skite around town when you have one"

you must be getting repeat views & people must covet this for its usefulness & commerciality after all! i write "rare" on many of my auctions for things that truly are, ie One of a Kind paintings & prints but they only get the odd hit, i can only assume because it's just "useless" art executed by an "unknown" artist! the original of one belongs to sean astin. he loved it & told me it was going into his LOTR museum. but no one i've told believes me & so far have had little interest in it!"

Here is what I would write if only I hadn't come to the conclusion that this person has some sort of a mental disorder.

Yes, I'm touchy about people who don't take care of their collectors items: if they are not taken care of, they cease to be collectors items. Good for you for having so many, I have quite a few myself - that's the point of being a collector - to amass a collection (or 'collect'). Some may be tempted to skite around town, but most people are secure enough in themselves that they don't have to walk around name dropping. "Rare" means just that - that it 'rarely' comes about, ie only once and a while. "One of a kind" means there is only one. I know perfectly well there is more then one of these bags around - I own more then one. Yes, your art is really quite crap. Fan art hardly ever gets bought because collectors see no point in owning it - if it were an original John Howe or Alan Lee painting then it would be worth thousands, but yours unfortunately is not. No-one belives your story because every man and his dog in this country has a LoTR story - I have numerous LoTR stories. To quote a very famous movie: "You are not special, you are the all singing, all dancing shit of the world"

A Summer-Time Challenge

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OK, your holiday is almost over and the weather's a bit crap (at least if you live in New Zealand. If you don't not you're probably at work so have you really got anything better to do?) so I thought I'd post a question to the users of LiveJournal (well, my very small friends list and the people they point to this post... *hint hint*)

I've recently discovered that I am the world's worst flirt. This most likely accounts for the rather long dry-patch I have had and also for the fact that I rarely get anybody I actually want (as opposed to the ones I don't want who I have to turn away which just makes me feel worse given the unreasonably long dry-patch...)

Anyway, because I'm useless at subtlities (otherwise I'd have no problem with the flirting) here it is straight up:

How do you flirt?

What are your 'moves'?

What's the thing guaranteed to get you in the sack?

Because I'm sick of not knowing, because dammit I am a sexy woman who likes sex, who is just a wee bit picky and who has no idea how to tell the ones she does like that she likes them.

So I ask for your help, the help of the Livejournal community at large - help a girl get laid.

Shortbus

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See it.

Best film I've seen since I can't remember when.

:-)

Just 'cos you're old you think you're wise

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OK, I'm terrible at updating, I'm sorry.

No, actually, I'm not. My personal journal (a strange thing these days - it's written on actual paper with a real pen) has a large number of entries. In my absence from online blogging I've started reassessing myself, and I'm discovering more and more every day that I am fucked up.

I have body issues and I'm not confident. My total belief that I failed everything this semester led me to come home and mainline vodka (as well as anything else I could get my hands on) half way through the exam period. As it turns out I've passed at least 3 of the 4 subjects and all that worry (not to mention the substantial hangover) were for nothing.

I've stopped smoking. Today is Day 16. Day 17 commences in 19 minutes. The big urges are gone, but occasionally I really want one. I can be around smokers but I find myself lecturing them which is entirely a product of trying to convince myself that I don't want and/or need one. The not smoking thing means that I'm a little more anti-social then usual as I tend to hide in my room watching DVDs, TV or reading.

I'm becoming more and more convinced that I like being single.

Yeah, the lack of sex is a bit horrible, but honestly, I've got enough sex toys to deal with that.

I like the independance of being single. I'm a little nutty and well equipt for keeping myself company so the whole companionship thing isn't a big deal - I have friends and I have family and I have myself. I'm beginning to come to the conclusion that unless someone really special comes along; someone who respects me and my boundaries (and my independance - I love that more then any man or woman I'm afraid) that I'm just going to remain single for the rest of my life, and I'm OK with that. I'm not sure my mother will be (I think she's looking forward to the grandkids that probably won't be arriving through me) but I am.

I've been listening alot to Lily Allen. She rocks. She has some very cheeky lyrics but I've been feeling quite feminist and anti-boys lately so she's pretty much the perfect accompaniment. I'm looking foward to the Big Day Out - I will definately be grooving out to her that day.

Well I'm going to go, no doubt I'll be up for a few hours yet with my crappy November-December insomnia but unfortunately the computer room will be closing soon

Rainbows and Lollipops

Stupid Forwards

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I got an email today - a foward. It was from someone I don't like very much, don't talk to and don't consider a friend, yet she thought it was appropriate to send me what might be accurately described as the worlds worst foward.

First of all - I've seen the same email come from the UK - the only difference between the two (this includes the statistics at the bottom of it) is that all references to the 'UK' has been replaced with references to 'NZ'. While I can't pass comment on the UK version, having never been there I thought I'd add my comments to this version. Partly to be trite, partly because I'm bored with an hour and a half to my next lecture and having just finished my essay.

Being a Kiwi is about driving in a German car to an Irish pub for a Belgian beer, then travelling home, grabbing an Indian curry or a Turkish kebab on the way, to sit on Swedish furniture and watch American shows on a Japanese TV.
How many people here have a german car? Hands up please. Any Audis, BMWs, Porches or Volkswagons in the house? No? That would be because Kiwi's by far prefer their Mitzis, Hondas, Subarus, Holdens, Fords, and Mazdas. I'm not saying German cars don't exist in New Zealand - I live in Auckland I'd be stupid to say that but in general, German cars are not the ones we buy.

We do however have a fondness for Irish pubs.

On Belgian beers... this is a list of some Belgian beers, go - take a look - I'll wait here. Tell me how many you know. Personally I know one of those beers. I also happen to be quite fond of it (Stella Artois). As far as I'm aware Kiwi's are much more likely to reach for a Steinlarger, Tui, Lion (Red, Brown, Double Brown), Waikato, Speights, Macs (one of the many different versions) or Monteiths. We're a patriotic bunch. We might dip into the Aussie stores (Fosters, XXXX, VB) but as the song says "you can get Fosters on tap, but it still tastes like crap"...

The kebab holds up, I've had numerous kebabs while pissed - that said I've had many more hamburgers and/or chips while pissed. The White Ladies in Queen St (Shortland St if you want to be pedantic and it's moving soon anyway) and Newmarket I am finding are the stuff of legends. Quick, polite service and the hamburgers are the best I've ever tasted (please note I was rather pissed at the time). Wellington has an all night 6-night-a-week (not open Monday night) fish and chip store that serves a bad-ass hawaiian burger at 3 in the morning and is right next to a strip club making for interesting people watching. Curries... hands up all who have had a curry after getting pissed? I honestly couldn't think of a worse idea really.

Personally I have no idea where my furniture was made and I'll concede that it may have been made in Sweden but more likely it was made in either New Zealand or China. Most New Zelanders have at least one piece of Made-in-China, assembled-in-the-living-room, Warehouse bought furniture. I have several. They are most definately not made in Sweden.

I conceed American TV shows - but very few English-speaking countries have a complete absence of American programming, and many non-English-speaking countries also show it, so it's a bit of a non point - it's not "only in New Zealand".

I could be wrong here - but who has a TV not made in Japan? I know I don't. Again, I'd say it's one of Japan's major products - it's another non-point, you can get a Japanese TV to watch American programming almost anywhere.

Only in N.Z. ... can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.
Not always true. Ambulances can get there quick if it's an emergency and pizza places can be very slow if the rugby's on. Now if we were talking about the police instead, then there might be a point.

Only in N.Z. ... do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to the back of the shop to get their cough, cold, aspirin while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
Every supermarket I've been in makes you walk half way across the aisles, then half way up that aisle. I'm splitting hairs I know, but it's not "all the way to the back" that's (generally) where the Deli and Bakery go. Show me a country that doesn't make people buy ciggy's at the front. Again, it's a non-point.

Only in N.Z. ... do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries and a DIET coke.
Can't argue with the fact it happens, but it also happens in the US, the UK, Australia and anywhere else with a bloody McDonalds.

Only in N.Z. ... do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to the counters.
They do indeed chain pens to the counters but the doors are not open. I'm with the National Bank and they have to press a little button to open the doors every time someone wants to get in. I'd have to conceed in the case of KiwiBank though. Damn post offices...

Only in N.Z. ... do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars on the drive and & lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage.
Not in Auckland we don't! Leave your expensive car in the drive and watch it speed away... Bye-bye car... Anyone with a garage full of 'junk' generally has a not-so-expensive car sitting in the drive.

Only in N.Z. ... do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.
I only know one person with a machine capable of screening. Last time I checked most people used Telecom's message service, on which you can't really screen in the conventional sense. But that said... any country in the world with these capabilities does the exact same thing. Another non-point.

Only in N.Z. ... are there disabled parking places in front of a skateboard park.
Anyone ever seen that? All I've ever seen infront of skate parks is a gravel area perfect for doughys. Things may have changed since I was a teenager and hanging out at skate parks though. Besides, there is nothing to stop a deaf person skating. Who says a wheelchair can't go up and down some of the ramps at a skatepark?

NOT TO MENTION...
3 Kiwis are injured each year testing if a 9v battery works on their tongue.
58 Kiwis are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of screwdrivers.
31 Kiwis are injured each year by watering their Christmas tree while the fairy lights were plugged in.
8 Kiwis had burns trying on a new jumper with a lit cigarette in their mouth.
A massive 543 Kiwis were admitted to emergency in the last two Years
after opening bottles of beer with their teeth.

and finally.....

In 2005 eight Kiwis cracked their skull whilst throwing up in the toilet
I had a look around and while the UK publishes Hospital Episode Statistics they'll tell you only what happened, not how. (fell out of tree etc) New Zealand tends to publish Mortality Statistics. I highly doubt the accuracy of these results but as I can't be bothered to fully research I'll let you make your own minds up

Interesting Link: Only in America (sound familiar?)

IF YOU'RE PROUD TO BE A KIWI SEND THIS ON - YEAH RIGHT

Referencing

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Ah, university life - the pub on campus, the endless wait for a computer, almost being run over on Symonds Street... it's all fun and games until it comes to the real stuff - the essays and the study.

So, in starting my first two essays I firstly headed to Wikipedia to gain inspiration. I best clarify - in no shape or form can we reference Wikipedia in an essay - I just use it as a basis for ideas. So I find this fantastic quote on Wiki, which of course I can't use unless I can find the original source (this in turn of course is not referenced on Wiki - that'd make life easy!) Cue the last week and a half where I have been searching the University Library in every spare moment for this quote.

Today I found it. The whole damn article, hidden away in the 2nd floor. That's quite a feeling of accomplishment. I can officially use the quote because I have it's source!! Haha!

As part of an assignment (on malls and consumption) I get to visit malls around Auckland... Shopping in the name of eduction...

I love my life :-)

Things I have Learnt About Auckland

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1. People walk slow and in all sorts of directions - I'm rather used to the high paced everyone-walking-on-the-left style of Lambton Quay, walking (sorry - meandering) down Queen Street on whatever side you please does not make me happy - it just makes me kick the back of your ankles and want to scream.
2. Getting up an hour early means you'll get there half an hour early - there's some crazy thing going on in the time-space continum here!

I've only got two right now. I came in early to do some work (see point #2) and have just realised my pencil case is sitting ontop of my laptop, which is on my desk, at home. Fat load of good it's going to do me there!! Cue one trip to the bookstore for pens and highlighters, crap.

Day off on Friday - YAY!

My country for some sleep

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The biggest thing that is happening in my life right now is that nothing is happening in my life right now.

I'm currently enjoying my 20th day without a day off. Below is an easy to understand (hopefully) table of what my days look like... (you do not want to know how many attempts this took!)

Time	Mon	Tue	Wed	Thur	Fri	Sat	Sun
00:01-02:00	SLEEP	SLEEP	SLEEP	SLEEP	SLEEP	WORK	WORK
02:01-04:00	SLEEP	SLEEP	SLEEP	SLEEP	SLEEP	SLEEP	SLEEP
04:01-06:00	SLEEP	SLEEP	SLEEP	SLEEP	SLEEP	SLEEP	SLEEP
06:01-08:00	SLEEP	SHOWER	SHOWER	SHOWER	SLEEP	SLEEP	SLEEP
08:01-10:00	SHOWER	UNI	UNI	UNI	SHOWER	SLEEP	SLEEP
10:01-12:00	UNI	UNI	UNI	UNI	UNI	SHOWER	SHOWER
12:01-14:00	UNI	UNI	UNI	UNI	UNI	STUDY	STUDY
14:01-16:00	UNI	UNI	UNI	UNI	UNI	STUDY	STUDY
16:01-18:00	UNI	STUDY	UNI	WORK	WORK	WORK	WORK
18:01-20:00	STUDY	STUDY	TV	WORK	WORK	WORK	WORK
20:01-22:00	STUDY	STUDY	TV	WORK	WORK	WORK	WORK
22:01-00:00	SLEEP	SLEEP	SLEEP	WORK	WORK	WORK	WORK

Note: Travel and eating are not considered part of my timetable - I do them when I have to or when I have the time.

What you are effectively looking at is alot of work. Too much work. I would like to hurt my manager who's terrible time-management skills meant she could not send one email which would have avoided this situation. One email would have asked other projectionists within the company to come do shifts. I warned her two months ago this would happen, and I'm not the only one who's suffering! One of our projectionists is pulling doubles because I flat out refused to do Tuesday nights and 2 projectionists are pulling 6 day weeks (including doubles) between projection, school and management duties.

I signed up for two shifts a week. If you count up all the hours I am at uni, studying or at work it is 94 hours - that's 2 full time jobs and a part time job, that's the equivelent of THREE jobs!!

Those TV hours - Quite plainly they are the only time I get to myself, for myself each week (not counting showers). 4 hours to myself each week!! I am going mental - and thus far I've been keeping this up for 2 weeks. 8 days left...

8 days left...

Hanging out

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Well, uni's back.

It's a good thing. It means I'm not constantly at work, and if I am at work I have something productive to do. You see I'm taking two English papers this semester - Literature and Drama. This means one thing I didn't think of when I enrolled - it means alot of reading. It means reading Dr Suess, comics, Austen, Tenessee Williams, Lolita, Gulliver's Travels, Shakespeare, Tolstoy... the thing I'm most greatful for is that the Tolstoy isn't War and Peace!! (Which I am ambling through anyway - when I get the time). As a result if I'm eating - I'm also reading. Travelling on the bus? I'm reading. Waiting for a lecture? Reading. In the pub... reading. At home, reading. You get the idea. I'm lucky that I have a job that allows me time to read!!

Ontop of the literature I'm doing two Geography papers - Physical and Human. The really strange thing is I thought I would be more interested in the physical geography but it seems I'm not, I'm enjoying the human geography alot more. It's possibly got something to do with the lecturers (the guy for physical geography is one who took some of our lectures last semester - which I generally tried to avoid at all costs) but it does amaze me that I am happily getting up at 6.30-7 to come in to the human geography lectures because I enjoy them (can't wait for the lecture on sexuality!)

So yeah, I'm also a very busy person (apart from all the reading). I'm working 4 nights a week, the downside of this being that it completely screws up my sleep pattern. That said I've only got two more weeks of it then back down to two shifts a week, during the day on the weekends. As it is I don't have a day off (where I don't have uni or work) until the 4th of August, and I plan to keep it completely free - I just want a day to lax out and do nothing.

In other things... who else thinks Winston Peters is a complete Dickwad? I mean, I'm hardly the biggest fan of the US at the best of times, but the fact is politically speaking it is good to have them on our side - free trade is a huge deal. So we've got a future presidential candidate saying that NZ-US free trade deals are a good idea and what does Winny do? He interrupts and shuts down the interview because the press were asking too many questions!! I said something about it when the moron was put into this position and I'll say it again - dumbest decision ever. (for those who don't know what on earth I'm on about have a look here.)

Anyway, much as I prefer to avoid it in first week back, I'm heading to the quad for lunch - ciao!

General Update

NOTE: This is an archive post from LiveJournal which has been logged here for posterity.

Oh dear, I'm discovering something awful... I am a girly-girl.

Might sound odd my saying that, but I've never really been a 'girly girl'; never really cared about makeup - except when I was going out, didn't own skirts, didn't care about heels or earrings or clothes...

Last few years it's been slowly building up to the point where I woke up the other day in my new Oscar the Grouch pajamas, had a shower, put on a body moisturiser (one with tanning stuff in it), facial moisturiser, eye cream, concealer, foundation, mascara, got dressed into matching underware, a skirt, stockings and a frilly top then spent 15 minutes deciding what earrings to wear.

I am, in fact, a girly-girl - that's three different types of moisturiser I put on!

Granted I'm a girly-girl who swears and drinks beer, but nonetheless, I am a girly-girl.

The other day I was at work and I realised... if I undo my belt, my pants fall down. This was a little strange given that when I moved to Auckland I was Size 20. The jeans I was wearing at work were size 18.

This could only mean one conclusion...

So I decided to test my theory. I went to Farmers with my shopping buddy and loaded my arms with size 16 pants. In my imagination I could see this leading to the same place it always leads - me winding myself trying to do up the buttons and ending up in a crying mess on the floor.

With trepidation I went into the changing room, closed the door and put on the pants to find... they bloody well fit! Perfectly! Nice and snug in the right places... I could sit, I could squat, I could walk and run - most surprisingly I could breathe! After checking the clothes weren't somehow mis-labelled I bought two new pairs of size 16 pants.

I haven't been a size 16 since I was about 13/14. While all the girls at school were buying fashion from Glassons, I was trawling Farmers, K-Mart, DEKA and The Warehouse for good-looking, fitting clothes.

Let's just say that I was a little fashion-clumsy back in high school.

But yesterday, after the amazing revelation I asked my friend if she'd mind going to Glassons. Normally I hate that bloody store (mostly cos nothing ever fit and it bought back horrible memories of high school), but yesterday it was my goal. I had to try something - anything - on. I wasn't going to buy it (and having seen the clothes in there I was bloody sure of that), but I did want to put it on.

So we went in, I found a fun skirt with netting on the inside to make it puff out. I went into the changing rooms, and the horrible changing room vision re-surfaced. If it didn't fit I was going to cry. But no, the skirt went on effortlessly and as I looked at myself - in a Glassons changing room - wearing this hideous skirt, I felt elated, overjoyed and amazed. Somehow, I am losing weight, and it's fantastic!!

When we got home we compared the long-retired (now passed on) size 20's to a brand new pair of 16's and it's a good 4 inches less.

Horah!

I want your money!

NOTE: This is an archive post from LiveJournal which has been logged here for posterity.

Wow, so the whole dentist thing has kicked me up the ass in so many ways.

First off, the whole money thing. It's costing me a packet-load to do the dentist thing, but at the same time by doing it, I've combined my debts into "one easy to manage loan". This means Victoria, my Visa has died a death dredded by all visa cards, but that said - she only bought me stress. So my debt repayments have decreased now, therefore there is more money in my pocket, and do you know what I'm doing with it? Well, granted, I've bought about a gazillion pairs of underware in the last couple of weeks (I have a thing for undies at the moment) but I've also started doing something I don't do - saving. Yup, me - saving. It may seem like a very small thing to most people but to me, this is huge!

On top of the saving I've given up The-Dread-Evil-Coke. Again, this is a miracle. I love Coke, and there's none of that wussy Coke-Zero or Diet-Coke for me, I love the high-sugar, really-bad-for-you Coke. The stuff that'll disolve a T-Bone steak, that's the shit - I've given it up. In the four weeks since my first appointment I have had one 600ml bottle. That was last week and I promptly brushed my teeth. One bottle in a month is amazing!! The withdrawls are all-but-gone (had trouble sleeping, not to mention waking up!! A few mood swings as well) and by not drinking Coke? Saving around $18 a week, which goes, you guessed it - into the savings account.

In giving up the coke, I've taken to drinking water. Not only have I given up Coke, I am now drinking at least a litre of water a day - that's more water now then I used to have of Coke! I've got 3 water bottles on constant rotation in my fridge, and I hate going anywhere without one...

Having taken up the water I've also started to realise how much junk I consume. So I'm making an effort to curb that. I live in a hostel and I hate the kitchen so I've been having sushi instead of Maccas. I've been having whole-grain bread instead of white, hell I'm even having breakfast with healthy yoghurt! (The Acodopholus or however you spell it stuff).

This one thing, the routine of my weekly dentist appointments - of knowing that a day or so after that appointment I will feel that weebit better about myself because one or two of my teeth are back to normal, it's making me a better, healthier, more independant person, one tooth at a time.

Sure it's costing me a bomb, but it's much more then my teeth - it's my whole life. If I keep going the way I am I'll be well on track to getting out of this hostel by August. I'll also have to buy myself a new wardrobe because at some point my body is going to realise I'm not feeding it so much junk and I'm not giving it a ton of sugar each day and I'm going to lose weight. Not so much that I'm a skinny stick, but enough that when I go clothes shopping I can find some that fit and look good. I'll be able to shimmy around my room to Lady Marmalade in my sexy underware knowing I am sexy dammit.

And that feeling? You can't put a price on that, but if you did, and that price was $2763? Worth every penny.