Yo sound the bell school's in sucker

But if my mother tells me to get a job one more time before Monday I'm seriously going to go mad. I'm not even supposed to be back before then, I didn't come home early to get more money, I came home early for two reasons: Save money on rent, and enjoy a few days with my friends, after that, THEN I'll worry about a job.

I've already been to WINZ, Student Job Search and done quite a lot of shit today, all I want is a holiday before standing on my feet for upwards of 6 hours a day sweating and not getting paid enough to do so.

But that's my complaints for the day, being home's been a bit of a disappointment though, I haven't seen as many people for half as often as I'd like to, but after tom morrow most of their exams are over, and those who don't have exams tomorrow are coming to see me in town.

I'll be, Home Again

This'll officially be my last update for this year from Wellington, as I'm packing up my computer tonight and going home on Tuesday *yay*

I may miss Rotorua now, but I guarantee I'll be there a week and dying for my freedom and the 24 hour store!!

But on Monday I'll get to see two people I've been missing dearly... my Mother and my Best Friend, Charis (yes! I finally mentioned her... she's been wanting me to for a LONG time now) so to all the Rotoruians and the Aucklander who has decided to drive down and visit (you know who you are) I'll BE HOME SOON!

Ho ho ho and a bottle of Rum

Saw the Santa Parade today, over a month in advance, and just gave me more reasons to hate Christmas.

Well, the floats were ho-hum, there was not a Macintosh in sight and Santa was SO LAME it was past lame, past funny, it was annoying. He had a monotone voice that constantly was saying "hello? hello? ho..... ho.... ho.... hello?" in fact, I'd have to say, the most lively part of the whole thing was... wait for it... the More FM float, the ZM float and the McDonalds float (which really are three things I despise) More FM had their survivors on board, who I recognised from that TV doco which I ended up watching accidentally, the ZM one had Lions (the rugby team) on board and the McDonald's one had a very lively Ronald McDonald getting the little kiddies going.

I saw the stars from The Tribe, but didn't even recognise them until I got handed a "the Tribe fan club" card thing. If it was on TV2 or 3 I'd watch it, but something has to be PRETTY darn special to get me to watch it on TV4 since most of it's infomercials and cheesy American teenage sitcoms.

The two friends and I I'd gone with were most disappointed to get no Macintosh's, in fact, the lollipop one of them got got ripped out of her hand by the man who also got a Santa Hat from the ZM float! It didn't help that I didn't hear "Merry Christmas" once. What is a Santa Parade without Macintosh's and the Christmas Spirit? I went expecting a better parade then Rotorua, and came out with a much longer, worse one. One of my friends commented even the ones in Blenheim are better.

So 3 most disappointed Massey students trail into Te Papa to find a toilet, and travel to the 4th floor to find on that ISN'T packed, and then to New World, and try to get out of there quick as 'cos it's packed too.... darn it.

But today has given me a passion to boycott Christmas one year, not buy or receive any presents, not get up at 6.30, not go back to sleep a richer person an hour later, not to wake up just before the peanut butter sandwich dinner and not think about the Boxing Day sales... well maybe all but the last part. Am I the only person who actually, really loathes Christmas? I'm not sure what's happened.. I used to love it, but these days I can think of many more exiting days of the year, the only great thing about Christmas is the atmosphere of summer, holidays, and shopping. Bugger all this present crap, bugger the hours in the kitchen preparing a huge roast for a summers day, bugger breaking toys an hour after you get them, I just want to go back to sleep and eat my peanut butter sandwich in peace.

But as it stands, this year I want my Big Day Out ticket :-P

'cos I've seen better days

Well, I just got back from watching Mary Staple playing at Indigo and I'd just like to say that those boys have a lot of potential. I never watch concerts as a concert-goer per se but as a musician, and they had good dynamics and a good stage presence, although the sound could definitely have been better.

I've been incredibly tired all day, and the small amount of alcohol I had tonight has made me about ready to fall asleep on top of my keyboard, which would actually make my column look pretty fucked up...

On the situation below, I think I'll stick at it, there's not much to lose in my opinion, and definitely more to gain, this I'm sure my mother'll be happy about.

There has been a lack

Some people may have noticed lately there has been a lack of my depressing views on life that I have been known to post. So here's something to satisfy that need.

In the last 8 months, while I've been away from home, I have changed, I was chatting to my mother today about it, it seems I have lost a lot of myself over the time I've been in Wellington. I am seriously considering not finishing my course next year, other options seem more appealing, and people who knew me before I moved will know I rarely give up.

I didn't give up drums, I spent a year (yes, a whole 12 months) trying to get the drum beat to ONE SONG right, since I had started drumming I couldn't do double kicks, where the right hand and my foot work at different times, and it was crucial for the drum beat. I practised in classes, in exams, in the car, in bed, but I couldn't get it. I would sit in class and instead of writing notes, I would write drum notation and follow it to try get it right. I still remember the day in Food Tech where I got it. I almost ran around the room screaming "I can do it! I can FINALLY do it!".

I didn't give up trying to do my best in sixth form, I hated it, really hated school, 'cos being big I tended to get mocked, the teachers, on the most part were good, but the rules, regulations and the hideous uniform were bad (as I'm sure Deeps could probably agree) and I hung around with the geeks, which in hindsight was a good thing, but at the time I wasn't to comfortable admitting it. All thru sixth form I had my eyes on the goal of the course I'm doing now, to be a chef, to cook for people, and to live in Wellington. I did that, and I remember telling everyone that went through my till at Big Fresh, the day I got accepted that I'd got into Massey, Wellington.

I had a goal to have the best darn going away party in a long time. I organised a venue, 100 personalised, DIFFERENT invitations, a DJ, booze, bouncers... with the help of a friend, and it was the last piss up before school went back, and everyone loved it, except for the people whose stuff got nicked.

I wanted a boyfriend, and although I never got one in Rotorua, it never phased me, I could live without one.

In February, my goal was to come out top of the class, unfortunately, my self confidence level dropped, the time it took me to tire myself out decreased, and I began to dislike my lecturers, I became disillusioned, and I didn't want to do it, and I still don't know if I do.

I was not a quitter, and I'm becoming more determined not to be as I write this. I've had massive money problems this year, spending my rent on other things, spiraling into huge debt, but I'm now willing to see that it's been a mistake, and I'm willing to take responsibility for it, my first step into that was actually telling my parents about it.

Talking helps, writing helps, and publishing my feelings, and getting feedback from people I hardly know makes things seem more important in so many ways, I want to know what you people think, how you would react if you were placed in a new town, with no friends, placed into a course and becoming disillusioned with it, and most of all, loosing a valuable part of yourself in the process.

I leave it up to you

I will NEVER.....

...get sick of watching goths bowling

NEVER

I know it's been around for a while but this ad deserves an award.... and it's even better on the big screen :-)

If it's not what you're thinking, then you can go to hell

I think I had one of my most embarrassing moments as a chef today.

We have a four course meal to cook for our final assessment. Today was the practice run, I was in a kitchen I'd never used before and was having a joke with a few of the guys in there, and didn't notice the fact that the gas flame was up further then I thought.

As part of a chef's uniform we have these STYLIE pants (small check pants, in a similar style to 'MC Hammer Pants'), the chef's jacket, chef's hat, chef's scarf, an apron and a tea towel (to help with picking up pots and stuff).

So I'm having a great old time talking, until I realise... my tea towel has caught on fire...

So having put it out, made some damage to my ego and put a scorch mark on my apron... I had to buy new tea towels today.

The only word for this is bugger.